lexieonline

We all have a story about how we had a wake up call in our lives, how something shook us to our core and screamed “WAKE UP! & look at the world around you”, or how something or someone impacted our lives so much, that it changed for the better. For me, that something is Italy.

Yes, it may sound dramatic or cliché, BUT I do declare that Italy changed my life for the BETTER when I was 20 years old in 2019 and I will FOREVER be thankful for that opportunity. Let me tell you why…

Going into college, I was depressed. I was stuck in an on and off toxic relationship that was absolutely so draining and unhealthy. I thought that this was as good as life was ever going to get, and I was trapped not knowing how to be the independent person I used to be. The person that was draining my independence refused for me to grow and did not allow me to go out and make friends. I listened, even though he was 1,000 miles away (it was a long distance relationship). I had no friends, stayed in my dorm room, and made myself completely miserable for all of freshmen year to the point where I wanted to transfer schools and drop out of college. Flash forward to sophomore year, we ended up getting back together “more officially” and I was happier. Still not being allowed to go to bars, parties, or talk to other boys, I made more friends, was in academic clubs, and I started to begin to find myself and my place at Ole Miss. I was taking Italian and I absolutely loved the community that I found within it. Towards the end of sophomore year, my Italian teacher told us that they are looking for more students to join them on the summer study abroad program to Salerno. My friend, Riley and I were interested and asked for more details, not really thinking that it would actually end up happening. With 3 weeks of school left, Riley and I end up deciding to make this happen and go on this study abroad trip because it was such a good deal financially and we would get Italian class credit, too. As soon as we know it, school ends and we have a week before we are leaving to go to Italy.

Excited beyond belief, I flew out of New Orleans and met Riley at the airport in Rome after a looooonnng flight! We were so excited to start our study abroad journey and see what was in store for us (even though it started off with Riley’s suitcase getting lost and us getting thrown in a taxi by some Italian man hauling my luggage through the airport).

We got to Salerno the next day after riding the wrong train and getting kicked off more than half way there because we accidentally got on the first class train instead of the basic economy train… We had no idea how anything worked! But of course that was the fun part of the whole experience. Upon arriving in Salerno, everything is so new! No cell service, no idea of where or what ANYTHING is, no CLUE! I remember our host mom picking us up in her tiny black car and our luggage almost didn’t even fit. We then arrived at her house and had to shove our luggage in the 1-person tiny elevator and send it up by itself and then walk up six flights of stairs to get to our new home. We were welcomed to our new home and greeted by our host sister and brother. We then saw our one queen bed for the two of us to share for all 5 weeks, so yes of course we became best friends. Quickly, we discovered our favorite bar, sandwich shop, gelato shop, coffee shop, and more. We met the locals and Salerno was like home. And yes, we still got lost walking home multiple nights. I still cannot get over how Burger King turns into a legit raver at night and the insane club party we went to in Vietri (glow in the dark face paint and glitter included).

Being in a foreign country for 5 weeks really opened my eyes to the bigger picture of things and how big the world is. We are always worrying about what our friends are doing, what people on social media are doing, etc. When I was away from the usual routine as well as away from people that I see on a daily basis, it taught me so much about myself. I realized that there is so much more to life than to constantly be worrying about the small things. The world is so big and it made me realize that I can do anything that I set my mind to.

“The world is your oyster. You are the pearl.” -Vishal Mumbaikar

I know people always “go to a foreign country and find themselves”. It is even a card option on the “Most Likely To” card game (I know because I have received it plenty of times). But, let me get to the point of where I found myself. When I was in Italy having the time of my life, I realized that the world has so much to offer. I was going out, having so much fun, meeting new people, speaking a different language all while from 5,500+ miles away, my toxic ex boyfriend was still trying to tell me what I can and cannot do! It was in Italy that I realized I would not sit in my host mom’s house, in a foreign country, by myself while everyone else I was with was sipping on cappuccinos and eating tiramisu. I realized from 5,500+ miles away that I am my own person and the world is so big. I realized I cannot listen to the manipulation anymore and that it was time for me to realize how much of the world I had been missing out on and that is when I decided to live. I ended the relationship and never looked back, but continued to look forward. Coming from a toxic relationship, (and I really hate that saying) it has been hard to grow and realize that I am worthy of so much more than I believe to be. My friends can attest to the manipulation and toxicity that I had gone through since I was a senior in high school, and I apologize to them for being selfish, but thank them for being patient with me in finally seeing the reality of how things were.

I cannot believe it has been two years since I went to Italy and “fOuNd MySeLf”, but I will forever be so thankful for that experience and know that it was always something that was mean’t to happen. When things get tough in life now, I always joke to my friends about going to Italy and tell them that will fix all of our problems. When it doubt, go to Italy. Anyways, that is how Italy changed my life and another reason as to why I will always have a soft spot in my heart for Italy.